The Art of Being Happy

I don't want to be one of those people with a job.

I don't even want to be one of those people with a career.

I want to be one of those people with a lifestyle.

Now, I know that no job is perfect... but I'd like to love what I do. Really love it.

What I do for a living right now is fun. It's creative. I get to meet really cool, interesting people. I like the people I work with. Better yet, I like the people I work for.

But I don't love it. I can't picture myself doing it until I retire. There are often times when I feel like if I ever have to _____ again, I'm going to bash my head into my desk until I mercifully pass out.

Sometimes, when I see really awful pieces of work come through my desk, I feel the need to keep them. I want to frame them and put them on my walls... so I can see them all the time and remember why I want to get out. Because, really, sometimes, it's hard to think about leaving no matter how much I want to bash my head into my desk!

The thought of no longer being a student absolutely terrifies me. I know that sounds odd, but I've been a student since the age of three and the thought of not having my life geared towards a major educational goal scares the hell out of me. School gives me a purpose. And, hey, it's quite easy to gauge success. Am I getting good marks? Yep. Great. Success achieved.

Maybe that's not as irrational as I originally thought. Hmmm...

I've taken time off from school here and there since high school, but my life has always been geared towards my education. Maybe it's quite rational to be terrified of the fact that my life will cease to be so quantifiable.

So, in my quest to be utterly happy, I have to give up two things that I like: A job with great people and an okay task to complete that I like but don't love and an education that I'm clinging to so that I'll feel as if I'm accomplishing something useful.

Taking a huge jump like that is a hard thing to do, and to be quite honest, I don't think I'm quite there yet. So, I'll continue to go to work so that I can pay the bills and wean my way off of my security blanket of English classes.